We all need friends
My sadness surprises me. I listen to a story on the radio, my thoughts wander. I remember independence, waking up early and seeing the morning unfold while the coffee warms my hands and I have my thoughts to myself. Perhaps my sadness is the loss of freedom of 360 degrees of choice.
Now, I wait for my hair to be brushed while I rinse with the mouthwash. Mornings are the beginning of a cycle made up of being pushed, pulled and adjusted. Choice is limited and independence is only a word others use.
I have become someone I don't recognize. I am disinterested in doing anything. I am so sad inside. I'm without hope and motivation is just a disciplined action. I clutch desperately to any opportunity for comfort or extra mobility. Decay, disrepair and disarray overwhelm me, gloom and failure become my friends.
1 comment:
G`day Julius. I to am saddened.Your life has so completely changed since your accident. That you have STRUGGLED on with living leaves me wordless. I hope you can gain strength from somewhere and that you can find glimpses of happyness (Yes I know I spelled it incorrectly). I so wish I had a magic wand. You are in my heart. xxxcoralxxx
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